Why did Cloud think he was Zack?

Have you ever had a dream? Something you’ve wanted so badly you can taste it? Have you ever been friends with someone who was the very embodiment of that dream?

Some people in this situation would exude jealousy towards the person that had what they wanted, depending on what it was that they dreamed of. Some people would ignore that all and work for what they dreamed of anyways. Some people would just consider themselves not good enough to achieve whatever this dream was that they strove for and that this other person obviously deserved it for all their hard efforts.

Cloud, I think, was in that last category. He joined Shinra with a dream, a dream to become a first class SOLDIER, to prove himself, to make it big, to be like Sephiroth. Zack was all of those things. Zack was the embodiment of Cloud’s dream.

The way I see it, Cloud’s been treated like trash his entire life and so he’s got this self-esteem problem. By all rights, Zack shouldn’t give Cloud the time of day, especially if you were to ask him about that. I figure as time passed, Zack and Cloud became better friends. Zack was everything Cloud wanted to be, and he was a nice guy on top of that. Cloud must have been absolutely flabbergasted by Zack showing interest in being friends with him.

After being betrayed by a man so powerful he was considered a god, after being stabbed through the stomach by this man, after enduring five years of torture and experimentation, Cloud didn’t have much to go before completely breaking. It makes sense that when the only person who was with him through all this hell was killed in front of him, it’d be some sort of breaking point for him.

Cloud wanted his whole life to be accepted by those around him. When the only person who had ever accepted him was suddenly gone, it made sense for Cloud to cling to what Zack had been. Zack had been the one Cloud had looked up to, the one he strived to be like. With Jenova messing with his mind and a mental breakdown going on, Cloud wouldn’t have been able to move on his own. So he brought Zack with him.

"I never was in SOLDIER. I made up the stories about what happened to me five years ago, about being in SOLDIER. I left my village looking for glory, but never made it... I was so ashamed of being so weak, then I heard this story from my friend Zack... And I created an illusion of myself made up of what I had seen in my life... And I continued to play the charade as if it were true. The combination of Jenova cells, Sephiroth's strong will, and my own weaknesses are what created me. Everyone knew that. I'm.... Cloud. ...the master of my own illusionary world. But I can't remain trapped in an illusion any more....I'm going to live my life without pretending."

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